Many years ago now the Lord rearranged my life. After coming home to work on my own time and schedule, God took that opportunity to switch up not just my job but every aspect of my life. He quite literally nixed my whole calendar. He had me cut nearly every single thing that I had spent my life doing–job, board memberships, service work, friendships, hobbies, everything. Once He had it pared down to about nothing, I became settled with looking … vacant. I eventually stopped trying to hide the fact that my calendar wasn’t full. I stopped wondering if neighbors thought me lazy or assumed I was napping in those moments when I wasn’t but was praying instead. I finally conceded to His perplexing will.

Once I gave up the fight, He started putting pieces back together. Where He had made cuts, He now filled gaps. Where He had cleared my schedule, He now filled it.

And I came to realize that only those things that He wanted on the calendar needed to be there at all.

In the years since that core deep cut, He has taken me through seasons of great fullness and minimal workload. He’s added some things for a while and some for the long haul. And I’ve attempted to let Him be the One to order my days.

So here I find myself again. I wonder what doors will open and how many closed ones I’ll never see the other side of. How many hours I’ll spend wondering how I should spend that hour and how many I’ll wonder how I’ll get it all done in. What will this season hold?

I’ve seen Him do it before – take me out of an old to shape me for a new. But letting go is hard enough. Trusting in the greatness of what’s to come is another story entirely. Empty classrooms and dying loves. Quiet rooms and lidded boxes. Great replacements and unneeded availabilities. Where is my place now?

May we all enjoy the restful Sabbaths the Lord walks us into and through. May we all, likewise, enjoy the frantic Monday’s of kingdom usefulness. May we all attend valiantly to the voice of our Maker telling us which one we’re stepping into next.